Lent with a Toddler

Lucia (28 months) and I are sitting down for "school time" this Lent, which has consisted of me reading one Station of the Cross (from the book I share below) and the daily Mass readings while she colors a related coloring book page or two.  Then we have a little discussion.  It's pretty simple but has resulted in some great conversations and it's helped us focus our days around faith.  It has been so fruitful for us that I planning to continue this year round. 

I checked out numerous Easter and springtime books (both religious and not) from the library using this list and this one as my guides. As we make our way through them, I'll have to share some of my favorites with you.  Those books we've incorporated as "extra" reads before nap and at bedtime, but the heart of our "Lenten curriculum" has come from these few resources we own:

1. Magnificat - I've used our Magnificat to read the daily reading to Lucia while she colors either a general Lent coloring page or a page that relates closely to the day's Gospel.  If you don't have the Magnificat subscription, you can always find the daily readings at the USCCB website.

2. Coloring Book About Lent - I love this coloring book! It has pages that talk about some of the basics of Lent (why purple, what is Lent) and pages to correspond with specific Lenten readings, for example, today Lucia colored two pages on "The Man Born Blind" from yesterdays reading.  Hint: This is not one to get on Amazon - $1.57 at Barnes and Noble, $13.50 (for a coloring book!) from Amazon. Even with shipping B&N is a much better deal and they have a huge selection of Catholic coloring books around the same price point (we have the Catholic ABC Coloring Book and 1-2-3 Coloring Book).

3. Walking with Jesus to Calvary: Stations of the Cross for Children -  Perhaps a little too advanced for her age, Lucia couldn't maintain attention for the entire books, but she can definitely do one Station at a time (which is what we are doing - one a day).  She was very affected by the pictures which I feel were perfect - not to "cutesy" but certainly not too gory. The descriptions of each Station are definitely written for children but I don't think they are watered down.  There are many other Stations of the Cross books out there for children so if you have a great experience with another one, I'd love if you'd share!

4. Holy Heroes Coloring Book: The Passion of Jesus - We got this as part of the "Life of Jesus" coloring books set. I appreciate the detail in which it goes into the Passion - it's not just the Stations or the Sorrowful Mysteries, but a full narrative that begins in the Garden of Gethsemane and ends with Christ in the tomb.  I look forward to bringing out The Triumph of Jesus coloring book to continue the story on Easter. (Holy Heroes has a ton of other resources including a whole "Lenten Adventures" program that looks really great. I'm really hoping to add some of these resources to our home library in the next few years, but for now, I like starting small with only a few resources.  I get easily overwhelmed.)

5. My First Pictures of Easter - A board book Lucia got last year,  it is light on the words and full of pictures that make for a great jumping off point for conversations about Lent, the Stations of the Cross, and Easter.  I like to ask Lucia to tell me about certain pictures and it's always so humbling to hear her talk about Jesus with such love and compassion.  (She gets very upset about Jesus's "owies" and kisses them constantly.)

6. Stations of the Cross Coloring Book - We don't actually have this, but if we were to add one item to what we already have for this year, it would be a coloring book that Lucia could use along with our Stations book.  The Holy Heroes book we have works pretty well, but having something with the Stations specifically numbered would be great. 

I photocopy the coloring book pages for Lucia to color so I have access to the "masters" for years to come.  I'm actually hoping to someday take the coloring books apart and put the pages in page protectors in a binder along with other resources I print out and find elsewhere to help us celebrate the liturgical year.  I am definitely not there yet, though.

I'd also like to eventually incorporate some projects/activities but I either need to take baby steps or I end up doing nothing at all.  We did make these Lenten bean jars on Ash Wednesday, but I constantly found the beans dumped on the floor so they are staying out of sight until we can try again next year with a more mature three year old. 

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If you are looking for Easter basket ideas for toddlers, you may want to check out my post from last year of 50 Easter Basket Ideas for One Year Olds.  Most ideas would work well for the two year old and preschool crowd as well.

Blog Posts You've Been Dying for Me to Write (Blog Post Idea Generators to Beat Writer's Block) #7QT

I was having a bit of writer's block last night so I decided to get some help from some blog post idea generators.  Please take a gander at all the blog posts I could possibly write and if you so choose, you can "vote" for your faves in the comments and I may just have to oblige you in the next few weeks.  And if you're feeling a bit a writer's block yourself, you are welcome to steal any of these ideas and/or visit the generators themselves.
 

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Save Your Marriage Using Only Cooking

An interesting proposition. I can't say that my marriage is in need of saving, but an experiment in how stepping up my efforts in the kitchen affects our marital bliss couldn't hurt. 

via Portent's Content Idea Generator

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Lucia's Eating Habits

Well, she basically doesn't eat so this post might be short.

via TopMommyBlogs.com's Blogatron 2000

(This is obviously just for the mommy blogger but an added fun element is that you can submit ideas to be included in the Blogatron 2000.)

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Think You're Cut Out For Doing Books? Take This Quiz

Doing books? Also known as reading.  Quick version: 

Are you human? 

Do you know how to read? 

If you answered yes to both, you are cut out for doing books!

via HubSpot's Blog Topic Generator

(If you're wondering, the three nouns I put in were faith, toddlers, and books.)

--- 4 ---

You know what's great about butter?

I think this is the perfect title for introducing my readers to my poetry skills.

via Generator Land's Blog Post Idea Generator

(If you are feeling like something completely random.)

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Shoveling yourself out on a snowy day.

I don't think those of you who have had a horrible winter would appreciate a post like this from someone living in North Carolina.  But I can imagine a hilarious vlog "how to" shot on a hot, sunny day.  Well, hilarious if you're not currently snowed in somewhere else in the country.  Sorry, Dwija.

via Blogtap's Random Topic Generator

--- 6 ---

Our Shame and Nakedness

Not a generator, but I love this idea from Internet Business Mastery to search a topic on Amazon, choose an interesting book that pops up, and steal the chapter titles as topic ideas.  These awesome ideas are from the table of contents of Prayer: Our Deepest Longing.  (I searched "prayer".)  I also happen to have this book on my wish list now so it was totally a win-win - found great content to write and great content to read.

--- 7 ---

While we're talking blogs, check out this post by my friend Haley about setting a tone of charity on your blog.  She's so right on and, as always, super inspirational. 

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One of my favorite bloggers, Rosie, has a giveaway up for a Lilla Rose hair accessory from yours truly.  Enter here.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Let's Talk About Miscarriage

Recently, I've been setting up quite a few Facebook parties for my Lilla Rose business.  I also recently hosted an Usborne book party.  If you don't know how this works, a Facebook event is set up, the host invites guests, and at an appointed day and time, the consultant, host, and attendees all get on Facebook at the same time.  Questions are asked, games are played, information is shared.  It's really fun.  I enjoy putting on these events for customers and I had a great time hosting for my friends. 

I started thinking about how amazing it was to get people from all over the country (and potentially the world) to discuss one topic.  There is a completely different vibe from blogging because it's much more conversational and immediate.  I started to think about what else I could do as a Facebook event and the possibilities went much further than selling hair accessories.  I could set up an event on any topic and "meet up" with many other women who are interested in discussing it with me.  Sounds fun.  And enlightening. 

So what would I love to converse with other women about?  Books and raising children and marriage and...and...miscarriage.  More than anything what makes me feel a bit lonely and isolated right now is miscarriage.  I imagine I'm not alone in feeling alone.  While I think great strides are being made, it's still very much a taboo topic.  So, I'm creating a little space where we can talk about it.

I'm going to prepare some questions to talk about and some quotes and resources to share, but also I'm going to let the conversation go where it will and if structure isn't necessary, I'll put them aside and we can just talk.  You are welcome whether or not you've ever had a miscarriage.  If you haven't had one and would like to ask some questions to understand what your friend/family members are going through, all that we ask is that you are respectful.

In order for the event to be more private (not show up in news feeds), I have created a "Let's Talk About Miscarriage" Facebook group.  Please request to join the group and you will then be able to see and RSVP for the event within that group. Again, you do not have to have had a miscarriage to join the group, you just have to want to join the conversation. Then join me on Monday, March 31 at 9pm EST. 

Can't I get some advice for parenting an only child without being patted on the back?

I've recently been looking for resources on raising only children.  David and I still hope to have a large family, but Lucia is currently and could always be an only child.  She'll be around four by the time the next child comes along, at the earliest.  Being a part of Catholic circles, both in real life and the blogging world, I'm constantly hearing about all the benefits of siblings.  I agree that one of the greatest gifts you can give your child is siblings, but not all parents can give that gift.

Most of the Catholic families I know have I second child long before the first is four and I've been having a hard time finding advice for raising my little one.  Many of the things I have questions about (like how do I get Lucia to play independently and not cling to me 24 hours a day, or how to work on sharing) receive the answer "siblings".  Which at best is not helpful and at worst breaks my heart.  It's not their fault, I know.  That was the answer that worked for them.  But for me, it's not a possibility in the near future.

I really wish there were some resources to give me some pointers for socializing and teaching compassion and cooperation without siblings.  For example, I've been reading quite a bit recently about the drawbacks of overprotecting children.  Like this one saying mollycoddled kids 'grow up as narcissists' and that free play teaches them empathy.  Have you noticed that first time moms tend to overprotect and become more relaxed with each subsequent child?  Even if experience doesn't teach her to loosen up over time, necessity does.  With more children, there is less of mom to go around; children must become more independent, and they have opportunities for free play to learn patience and empathy and cooperation 24 hours a day.  I'm not saying that moms of many don't have to work on teaching those things (believe me, I know siblings fight!) but that the opportunity for continual practice has obvious benefits.

I know raising only children to be independent and empathetic can be done, but it requires much more intentional parenting to create opportunities for these lessons.  I have to seek out those practicing opportunities with Lucia and then need to make the most of them.  And because I have the time and ability to do everything for Lucia, I need to force myself to stand back while she learns on her own. 

So I've been looking for advice from parents who have been there.  But everything I find about parenting a single child seems to have such a smug attitude or worldly outlook.  "Good for you parenting an only child!  How responsible you are!  You're saving the environment!  Ending overpopulation!  Kids are expensive and you only have to pay for one!  With only one child you can have family without having to sacrifice career!"  

I just don't agree with that mentality.  At all.  I don't want to be told that having only one child is somehow morally superior.  After all, this is not a choice I've made.  I'd prefer a van load of raucous children, the anathema of the champions of "one and done".  As Annie said, it's difficult to have "society patting you on the back [while] you're mourning."  Indeed.

Comfort for the Grieving Mother from Another Place and Time

I am deeply saddened by the sorrow which has just come to you; it is indeed a real trial for you...May Our Lord grant you resignation to His holy Will!  Your dear little child is with God; he is looking down on you and loving you; and one day, you will posses him again.  This is a great consolation that I have experienced myself, and which I still feel. 

When I had to close the eyes of my dear children and bury them, I felt deep sorrow, but I was always resigned to it.  I did not regret the pains and the sorrows which I had endured for them.  Many persons said to me: "It would have been better for you if you had never had them."  I could not bear that kind of talk.  I do not think that the sorrows and the troubles endured could possibly be compared with the eternal happiness of my children with God.  Besides, they are not lost to me forever; life is short and filled with crosses, and we shall find them again in Heaven.

France, 1870.  From a letter written by Bl. Zelie Martin, mother of St. Therese of Lisieux, to comfort her sister-in-law after she experienced the loss of a child at birth.  Bl. Zelie Martin, and her husband Bl. Louis Martin, lost three children in the first year of life and another at age five.