I have a confession to make: now that I'm at home full time and not working, I don't get anything done. I am really ashamed to admit this because I know that there are many busy people that would love to have all the spare time I have and would take advantage of it. It's not that I purposely sit around doing nothing, but I have a very hard time getting things done when I don't have deadlines or limited periods of time to get things done. The busier I am, the more I get done. When I have unlimited time to complete tasks, I am constantly putting things off for later.
Case in point: as of tomorrow, we will be in our apartment for a month, but I have yet to make it into our home. Boxes still crowd various areas of the apartment, some half unpacked, some yet to be opened. Many items have made their way out of boxes, but have not found their proper place in our home. The apartment is cluttered and it is still very unsettled. Yet I can't seem to find the motivation to put it all away, mainly because I can't seem to find places for everything to go.
Our apartment is smaller than our previous one, but even more problematic is the lack of storage space - the closets are smaller, there are less of them, and there are less cabinets in the kitchen and bathroom. Additionally, our second bedroom in our old apartment was simply a guest bedroom, so we could fill the closet and dresser with clothes, holiday decoration, and other items that we don't need year round or that we are waiting until we have a house to use (all those beautiful crystal wine glasses and candy dishes!). But now the second bedroom belongs to our sweet little baby, who needs the dresser and closet for his/her own clothes. I tried to get rid of all our clutter and unnecessary items before we moved, and I feel I did a pretty good job, which means we can't get rid of anything else. Does anyone have any ideas for organizing and storing items in a small apartment?
Don't get me wrong, even though I have reasons why I haven't put everything away, I still should have done it. It has to be done (preferably before the baby is here or before the pregnancy is so far along that it will be difficult to move items around the apartment) and I know that it can be done. I just haven't done it.
Although this has obviously become a problem because our apartment is in disarray, it has became an even greater problem because it has been very self-defeating for me. I feel incredibly useless and lazy, yet instead of using that as inspiration to get going and get things done, it's made me even less motivated to work. I've started to believe that I'm incapable of getting anything done or that I can successfully be a stay-at-home-wife (and soon mother). Perhaps there are some crazy pregnancy hormones adding to this issue, but I am loathe to blame this on anything but myself.
This is probably making some of you reading this absolutely crazy. I know what you are thinking, because it's probably what I would think if I was reading this previously: Why don't you just get up and get it done? And here is my answer: I don't know. Not the best answer, but an honest one. I need some inspiration. I need some advice. I need some help. I really don't like admitting that I need help, that I can't do something on my own, but it's gotten to the point where I feel like I just can't do it alone. I am here, in a new state, where I barely know anyone, surrounded by the unknown, and it doesn't seem to matter if I make this place home or if my apartment is homey. Hopefully, as we get closer to the birth of the baby, I'll have a desire to nest and everything will fall in to place. Hopefully.