Thursday, April 18, 2013

A Sister

When my husband's brother married his wife last June, I remember thinking, "Lucky guy!"  His new bride is absolutely sweet, intelligent, faithful, and interesting.  She's beautiful and fashionable.  A culinary school graduate, her simplest meals outdo my "fancy".  She's very crafty and their wedding was the epitome of a DIY Pinterest wedding (you should see their apartment too!).

What I should have been thinking was, "Lucky me!"  You see, I grew up without a sister.  I always imagined that I would marry a man with lovely sisters and I would finally have sisters of my own.  But, just like me, my husband only has one younger brother.  And so my sister-in-law is the first sister I've ever had.

And she's exactly the sister I would have picked had I been given the choice.  My sister-in-law is proof that God has intricate and beautiful beautiful plans for our lives.  I'm not claiming that God put my husband and me together and his brother and his wife together only for me to get a wonderful sister.  But I do think that somewhere in the finely crafted details of the life he created for me, He considered my life-long yearning for a sister.

meeting their niece
A few weeks ago, as David and I drove home from an evening of dinner and games at his brother's, I realized that there was only one word to describe how I felt at that moment: complete.  The family we are born into isn't the only family we will have.  Our families will grow through marriages and births.  Through the family we are "stuck with" and the family we choose.  And sometimes the family we're stuck with is the family we'd choose anyway.

When we got married, my husband and I started praying the rosary together every night.  And one of our daily prayer intentions was this: "that our brothers will find good Catholic wives."  And when Johnny met Rebecca, we knew half our prayer was answered (my brother is dating a nice Catholic girl, but is a long way from marriage, so we're still waiting to see how that turns out).  What we didn't realize was that other prayers, ones that we didn't even know to ask, were answered as well.  Rebecca was always meant to be the aunt to our children, long before she met my brother-in-law (long before I met my husband).  And she was always meant to be a sister to me.

the day Lulu officially got an auntie
It's been less than two years since I met Rebecca, but I knew from the beginning that she was someone special.  David and I chose her and Johnny to be Lucia's godparents before they were even engaged.  Because I knew.  I knew that Rebecca was the one for Johnny and that she was already part of our family.  I think the only other time I've ever truly known something like that was when I met my husband and I knew

When David and I think about our future, we dream about living in the same neighborhood as his brother and Rebecca.  Our kids will run over to play with their cousins at a moment's notice and our nieces and nephews will burst in our backdoor unannounced.  My sister-and-law and I can spend our days together as well, bring each other's families food during times of sickness or a birth of a new baby, drop the kids off at each other's home when one of us needs to run to the store.  I'm aware that this is somewhat unlikely.  It's quite possible that when David eventually finds a job, it will be out of state and we'll have to settle for visiting a few times a year.  But it's still a nice dream and one I'm not going to give up on yet.


  1. So sweet. I have a younger sister. 18 years younger and a sister-in-law who is only 6a years younger. This relationship you share with you sil is amazing. :-)

  2. I loved this! I always wonder about the man I will marry and his family. I do have 1 sister but no brothers. It's so nice that you actually get along with her unlike the horror stories you hear about in-laws :)

    My cousin got married about 3 years ago and at the time I really didn't know much about his fiance except what I knew from other people (which really wasn't much). But she asked me to read the prayers of the faithful at their wedding and invited me to the shower and bachelorette party and ever since then we text and talk all the time. I wish she lived closer because I know we would hang out all the time!

  3. I really love David's cousin too! I only have one cousin, and he's five years older than me so she is the first female cousin I've had!

  4. Wow, 18 years younger! That's quite a gap!

  5. You got so lucky that you and Kendra are marrying into the same family too. I think it's really cool that my sister-in-law and I have the same last name, because I would no longer have the same last name as a biological sister, if I had one!

  6. Loved reading this. I also grew up with only brothers as did my husband. I am still waiting for a sister-in-law.

  7. Yes, it really is. Long, long story.

  8. Yeah I have about 20 cousins but they are ALL boys except 5 of them are girls (and 2 of the girls are only 12). So it's nice to have another girl cousin close to my age to talk to :)

  9. I hope when you do get one, she's worth the wait!


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